Friday, January 9, 2009

A kinder note to Mother Nature

cb does enjoy giving some sass to Mother Nature. That' only pisses her off more because you have to be nice and ASK...

To: Mother Nature
From: ProjectChristopher
Date: January 9, 2009
Re: Winter Storm Timing

I see from the news that you're going to be testing several forms of winter storms on the Chicagoland area over the next week or so. I believe we are prepared with warmer clothes and will be visiting the crack Jewel for provisions just in case.

I wondered if I might make a request. It is quite pretty to see the manner in which you send your snow storms as the quiet of my street with the flakes flittering down is quite peaceful. I'm thankful to live on a side street to avoid the traffic. But, could you consider beginning the storms around 2am or 3am. Given that, we can avoid rush hour traffic problems and MAY even, if you like, get out of work if you snow just enough to keep folks home! That would be great as I could sit at my window drinking hot chocolate and truly appreciating your artistic weather wizardry.

Otherwise I'm stuck walking in muck, getting splashed by cars and buses and otherwise freezing my who-who's off while waiting for the Pace bus that goes 2 mph along with the 'deez,dem,doz' asshat who keeps yelling "Jesus Christ!" because the bus is not here at his beckon call.

Should you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me. Thank you for your help


Mahala said...

You'd better break out the long johns... and don't forget to close the flap. :o)

cb said...

Um, she doesn't like it when you take the lord's name in vain...