Sunday, April 18, 2010

Just call me Mu Shu Google

While there was a looooong time where I wasn't blogging, there were still comments posted on my blog. There was a constant comment stream that was in Chinese. As you can see from previous entries, no comments posted during my hiatus were posted since they were mostly for me personally in support of my time.

Today, I received another Chinese posting in response to Feisty Friday. I thought I'd pull up the good old Google Translator and see what they were commenting on. Their comment was:

乳交挑逗淫婦色情俱樂部成人色情成人影片視訊網愛聊天室免費色情情色區火辣美女情色性愛成人影音聊天成人色情網站全裸美女圖片成人裸 照sex辣妹裸體美女全裸圖成人區av女情色內容情色自拍貼圖成人色情網性愛論壇一對多性伴侶成人聊天室撫摸淫美成人論壇女人奶頭女生自慰影片台灣女優美女視訊一絲不掛一夜正妹成人影像巨乳大奶子情色性愛貼圖情色王國做愛視訊火辣情色台灣情色網情色聊天網性愛技巧淫娃情色成人巨乳辣妹性愛知識性經驗
Which translated into:

Milk delivery tease whore porn video club porn video network adult love erotic chat rooms free sex zone net erotic sex hot beautiful women porn sites adult video chat adult nude pictures adult nude sex beautiful nude babes beautiful nude female erotic Figure av adult area erotic adult sexual content network self-timer maps forum-many sex partners adult sex chat rooms adult Forum, the U.S. women lewd touching tits girls masturbation video beautiful women video naked night Taiwanese actress working girl erotic adult sex video Big Breasts big breast erotic kingdom map Taiwan sex video hot erotic sex erotic web erotic chat network techniques Yin Wa Big babes erotic adult sex knowledge experience

What the.....

Now the comment would have been posted as a link somehow but how would WE have known to follow this link to see Big Breast erotic Kingdom map or a (and God knows what this is) Milk delivery tease whore.

So I must apologize to my Chinese friend that I will NOT post your comments, perhaps the milkman can since you're having trouble getting your dairy orders. But let me leave you with my own special farewell....

(which doesn't precisely translate.... but....)

Friday, April 9, 2010

Return of Feisty Friday!

Hello Blogverse! Yes I've been out of contact for quite a while, but it is what it is. I'm bouncing back in life finally and feeling good about the future. Do I have a job yet? Nope... but I'm still hopeful. I started pharmacy school (more accurately, the long road TO pharmacy school, but it's easier to just say pharmacy school since it's all going toward the same thing) in January and am really excited about this new career. More on that later. Now it's time for the return of Feisty Friday!

What's got me PO'd today:

Bullyin' Bitches

Phoebe Prince came from a small village in Ireland to South Hadley, Massachusetts to attend South Hadley High School. I don't know why, but I bet it wasn't to endure the bullying of the fat faced beyotch posse that began bullying her after she had dated 2 of the popular boys that, I'm sure, had grown tired of the posse and their stupidity. The bullying continued with no input or help from the school and the tragic end was that Phoebe took her own life to escape it.

What has me mostly irritated is that these stupid girls (and the boys that do it too) think they own the world and their lazy ass parents don't do a thing and probably say stupid things like "It's part of growing up" or "They're just kids" or "Yeah, that's my boy!"

What has me slightly irritated (more than slightly but I don't want to detract too much from Phoebe) is that this girl, who dated boys, is plastered all over the Internet and national news for her tragic incident. Is that wrong? NO WAY! The more bullying that is squashed the better. But what about the GLBT kids who are bullied EVERY DAY across the country and they're not given a single thought. What's worse is far too often the schools condone this action through their inaction. It's better than it used to be, but there's so much farther to go.

So R.I.P. dear Phoebe. I'm sorry that pie-faced petty girl ever crossed your path. To all the GLBT kids being tortured in silence. Hang in there, find a caring parent, or call a GLBT hotline to get help. If they can't help you, find a PFLAG group, they're the parents everyone could use :)

Darwin Award Winner

This idiot was on the Today show this morning. You can see on the video, he DARTS into traffic and BLAM! What irritates me about it? He sued the car driver and they reached a settlement. He's suing the bus company for not letting him out where there was a good cross walk. He rides the bus to work all the time (this he said in his interview) just like I do and even I know not to dart out in traffic or you may get hit! The fact that the car driver had to pay a dime is outrageous. I'll be damned if I'd pay for someone's stupidity like that! Had the car been operating unsafely, that's one thing, but he was not speeding, he was not swerving in and out of traffic, he was on the road like the other cars. I think the car driver should sue the idiot! Can you imagine the psych trauma suddenly hitting a human could cause you?

This Darwin Award winner is incredibly lucky. He's alive, is in a wheelchair now, but is expected to walk again. But given his stupidity, I'm guessing it's only a short amount of time before he gets it again.


Two complaint related Feists....

1. Today on Facebook a friend posted that he was glad he went to work today because they were handing out bonuses! Congrats to you! One of his friends commented:

"Don't even go there with me! My kid got more for his bday than I did for a bonus!"
Normally I don't snap back at people, but JEEZ! You have a job in this economy... THAT'S your bonus! 'Nuff said about that one....

2. During my absence from the blogworld I've had some very nice, supportive and treasured comments posted (that I kept private) supporting me in my time of uncertainty. For you, I'm TRULY thankful and even though I've never met most of you face to face, I count you among the special people in my life. There were a couple of you that wrote comments with statements like "You need to get over it and get back to writing" or "I'm really tired of coming to your site and not seeing new material".

To quote Donald Trump... You're fired.

Go ALLLLLLLLL the way back to to my very first post (which was ALSO on a Friday) and you'll see that my stepping into blogging was more about therapeutic than entertaining the masses. Oh sure, I'm very happy that I've collected some faithful readers and that some folks I've never met and have no connection with find my musings amusing (even you complainers) but this blog is a volunteer thing so unless you're going to start paying me, keep your barking orders to yourself. You've got a bucket load of nerve telling me that I need to get over the loss of my job, the upset of my professional life and what's caused me to go to a food bank (which is SO deflating) not to mention the loss and death of my best friend just so YOU can take your boring-ass life online to read about others and live vicariously through us.

Pay me and I'll write to your heart's content. Otherwise, Fluff you and the horse you signed in on!

Welcome back to Project Christopher!
I'll try to keep it consistent :)

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Seems like just a couple of days ago....

Plus 2 years... that I started blogging! Dang, it WAS! December 28 was my 2 year blogaversary.

I could back it up a couple of months since I've been out of sync, but let's just call it doing field research for blogging, stand up, something to bitch about, or at the very least something to compare to should times get tough again.

I've said that 2009 has sucked the big one and that 2010 has got to be better. I must admit, though, that 2009 had some positive aspects to it and I am thankful for them. I would like to go through a soul searching listing here, but I'm still not feeling THAT creative and this isn't for the contemplative author in me, I just want to give some general thanks.

Facebook - I know. Some folks just aren't very Facebookish, but I have met great new people. Best of all, I've reconnected with many people from Seneca, SC where I grew up. Often times reconnecting was like meeting new people because now we're all adults, we know what's important in life as well as what's NOT important... like all the petty high school stuff we were all living through last time I saw many of them in person. I've laughed and cried and visited many a trip down Memory Lane with these folks and I've been very sad that I haven't been able to travel back yet to see everyone in person. (Brace yourself Bobcats... January is coming!)

Family - My natural family, the two sisters and the brother. They're something I'm eternally grateful for and I don't know if I could ever tell them enough or make them realize the depth of my gratitude that they are a part of my life. You all may be 7 states and 17 hours away, but you're here with me 24/7.

Family - My 80's adopted family. You've seen "LeainSC" comment on my blog. She's been my "pseudosister" since the early 80's. We started the brother/sister thing since everywhere we went people thought we were dating. She became my sister for clarity, she stayed my sister... well, probably because I knew too much about her to let me go too far away.... In that package deal came her real younger sister and her mother. Later, Lea met her husband to be and after I finally convinced him (with cash) to marry her, he did. That quartet-o-crazy has made such an impact on my life throughout the years I wouldn't be able to laugh without them.

Family - The extended/chosen family that most gay folks make when they move away from home. Chicago is my second home and the people here have been a constant stream of smiles and support not only in the ick of 2009, but for the past coming on 10 years that I've been here.

So a big ole thank you to my fellow bloggers, my friends who with a 2 line email or text can make me laugh hard enough wet my pants, and to anyone who just thinks of me with a smile and a positive hope.

My new venture begins in 2010. Here's to the next decade!

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

As I live and breath!!

Hi everyone, remember me? I'm that tall goofy, sometimes catty (yes, sometimes) and hopefully often humorous blogger you haven't seen or heard from in quite a while.

I'm back.... ish...

Where have I been you ask? In a word - depressed.

I learned about depression in health care. I worked with depressed people and even walked that fine line between supporting a chronically depressed person who, unknown to them, their depression perpetuated itself, and finding a stern, but supportive way to tell the constantly depressed "yes, life's a bitch, pick yourself up, find a way over and let's move on.

One thing I always wondered when I observed depression in others was how did they get to this point? No one could answer me completely and I couldn't understand why until now. You don't see depression coming. You don't feel it settle in for the long haul making itself comfortable. You just feel one day that it's not there, then suddenly you find days, weeks, maybe even months have passed and you've watched every show TiVo has saved for you two or three times; you're watching a show on why lasagna noodles are wavy on the side vs. uniformly flat (an hour long devoted to this) and the show stays on because while the physical exertion of changing the channel is nothing, the mental stamina needed to actually compare this C-IV level anesthetic of a show to others is just a prospect you don't want to face. So... noodles it is.. how interesting, and yes it is like that sea anemone that undulates through the sea, and on and on and on and on....

So, next question, why was I depressed? It was overall a mixture of actual events, fear for the future, loss of the past and the worry of being a failure. It started in mid-October when after a 3 day weekend to recover from my annual meeting I come in to work to find that I would no longer have work to come to. I won't go into the details because by this point, I don't give a crap. However, when staff was being let go, it was FAC's decision that I should be one of the lucky ones.

What's FAC you ask? Ask away, I'm not saying here in print. However, if you know me and my penchant for foul language blended with names, you may figure it out. If you can't, I'll tell you directly. Here's a hint... the C is the C-WORD that most everyone hates.
Anyway, since FAC had done my job before I came there in addition to her job, apparently her omnipotence could deliver the association through the cataclysmic financial year that was, after all, obviously my fault. So Obama administration, blame Bush on all the money woes the country has, but leave this little section of blame off of Dubya's shoulders... it had to be me.

So, after having fired 2 people since I began, in nice professional adult conversations, FAC apparently decided that while I may be a big pussy pacifist and shy away from arguments let alone physical confrontations, FAC saw fit to have not one, but TWO armed guards be present in her office when I was shown the door. I was so flustered I didn't really ask anything during the informative session, but I did ask about the two gentlemen. "Well, I was told that in this day and age I should be careful." Damn, All this time I could have been planting C4 and plotting against the Hethen Americans... but I didn't grab the chance when I had it. When the gents walked me outside with my stuff waiting for the cab, we ended our conversation smiling and sharing a laugh. Yeah FAC, I think they were probably there more for MY protection than yours. For me to do something like that would actually require me to give a rat's fucking ass about you to get the ire up to actually do harm.

AND HERE'S THE KICKER!!! FAC, God's supreme gift to association management and the self proclaimed paragon of people skills and communication, hid behind the 65+ year old part time accountant/human resources staff member (whom I love to death). This meek little lady who handled the entirety of the conversation with me (the suspected Al Qaida terrorist meeting planner) while FAC sat there. I'm sure FAC was thankful to have that human shield to do her dirty work. This human shield, who also has lung cancer and at the end of 2008 had a biopsy and was out of work off and on for several weeks. My thought, "Poor Mary (not real name) she's had lung cancer, she's dependent on her cane, she's so independent, but now she's having a throat biopsy which will affect how and what she can eat for some time. I hope she'll be OK." What did FAC say? "Well what are we going to do about the audit? Why did she choose to have this done now?"

Many lessons I've learned the hard way in life have been harder because I have to learn them more than once. One thing I HAVE learned in my 43 years is that Karma is kind, Karma is your friend, but Karma can be one MAJOR bitch. And even though I don't get the pure joy of actually seeing it happen, Karma is going to come and teach you a painful lesson FAC. I won't get to see it. I may not even get to hear about it, but the universe is just and I know it's coming. I just truly hope that your lesson doesn't negatively affect those wonderful coworkers I left behind.

Author's note: I truly didn't mean for that rant to come tumbling out the way it did. This is my first writing since mid October and damn if the words and emotions just didn't come flowing out like lava.

So I find myself unemployed
at the end of the year
And looks like I'll have to either skimp or postpone getting my family and friends holiday presents

Geez... could this get anymore oppressive?

By now, everyone reading this knows I'm gay. If you didn't.... now you do. This wasn't always the case. I used to call it my Mason Dixon secret. Everyone above the Mason Dixon Line knew... no one below knew... well, no one confirmed that they did. (When I first talked with MaleSib about whether he knew, he said "I'm an artist, I'm a musician, I work in a design firm.... DUH...." )

Having grown up in rural South Carolina where having a gun rack was only a couple of small steps from gay bashing, it was a closely guarded secret I was petrified to let go. Even today I feel a tad uncomfortable talking about this side of my life with loved ones from home. Not that they care, not that I'm discussing.... well.... those things.... but the reflex of secrecy is never far away when it comes to folks from back home.

There was one person who existed in both worlds for me. I met him when I lived in Charleston, SC and he was gay. He was the first gay person I truly, fully knew and he was the first person I was able to look at and say "yes, gay people are just as normal as anyone else" and that's what he wanted me to understand throughout the first years of our friendship. It was a bit skewed because he was one of those people who was drop dead gorgeous, built like a brick shit house, but was completely unaware and/or unaffected by it. He knew me at my heaviest but of the two of us, it was only me seeing me at my heaviest.

There have been very few people in my life that I've been so moved by their personality, ease and demeanor that I sought to emulate them and wish that I could have the ease of self that they had. Andy Bauer was one of these people. He was my halfway house between being straight and being gay. He was one who could make me laugh so hard no number of sit ups would equal the exercise my stomach muscles had just experienced.

Two weeks after I lost my job to FAC, I lost Andy to a car wreck while he was in Germany.
To quote Forrest Gump "That's all I have to say about that"

So here I find myself entering November. I don't have anything to do that doesn't cost. I don't have anywhere to go. I refuse to take loans and I thought I'd be content to catch up on television and couch surfing.

Early November slid into mid November. Mid November slid into late November and my plan to TRULY clean my apartment and take part in NaNoWriMo (where I write 50,000 first draft words on my first novel had stayed right there with me on the couch, not moving; not succeeding, and shutting myself away from my friends, family and even my blog and (gasp) Facebook.

I'm not quite out of the woods yet for feeling blah. But, LeafromSC and her husband resumed their yearly trek to Chicago for Thanksgiving and having faces I love with me made a great energy to start rejoining life. I still haven't written a word on my novel (NaNoWriMo 2010?) but I'm about 60% through my to do list on cleaning, decluttering and preparing to redecorate my apartment with my landlord.

Depression is a discreet, but total asskicker. Don't underestimate it and look for the signs in your loved ones. They may not want to hear it from you, but often just having someone break through that shell of gloom gives a spring of positive if even for a moment. I found myself collecting those as I went through November and I'm starting to see hope. Hope in the form of a probable career change. I'm still looking for a full time job in my industry, but I do start Pharmacy school part time in January. I want to get to that 130+K yearly salary, buy a nice car, travel a little (rebuild my now non-existent 401K) and go by FAC's office, walk up to her and channel Kathy Griffin and tell her to SUCK IT!!!

Love to you all, thank you for the well wishes and concern. It really is knowing you're all out there that makes me smile. And as I always told my Mom; don't worry about me and suicide. I'm too much a chickenshit to do it. :)

Friday, October 30, 2009

just for space

Hi there!

It's been a while since I blogged. There's a good reason which I'll expound on soon. The real reason for this particular blog was to move that horrid Jim Carrey trailer picture down on my blog so I could see my other blog links.

What a waste of space huh?? :)

Blog you soon!

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Hello, your 15 minutes are up, thank you, good bye....

Last night I was doing some writing with the TV going in the background and I heard the advertisement for Disney's "A Christmas Carol" with Jim Carrey.

It struck me as I listened to it that even if I had not heard the name Jim Carrey, I would have known it was him simply by the fact that I've heard it all before... again and again and again. He's like Tom Cruise; a good actor, but he's not the character he plays, he is himself AS that character. Jim Carrey is not Ebenezer Scrooge, he's not the Grinch, he's not Ace Ventura, he is Jim Carrey pulling out the same sight and sound gags that he's beaten the dead horse with since he first played Fire Marshal Bill on In Living Color. Don't get me wrong, it was funny... 15 years ago. Since then it's as old and predictable as Cats.

So while griping on FB last night about Jim Carrey, I thought of others that are far extending their time of fame and really do need to step aside or come up with something so new we don't recognize that it's you! Here's the top list of offenders in my humble opinion....

Obviously... Jim Carrey - See rant above

Jack Black

WTF is this fool about anyway? I've never missed a Disney movie in the theaters since Aladdin came on the scene, but I didn't see Kung Fu Panda in the theaters because I just couldn't get past the fact that this idiot was at the helm. I did, ultimately, see the movie and I do like it. Mostly because A) the rest of the cast is fun and Dustin Hoffman is priceless. and B) You don't actually SEE Jack Black. I remember seeing The Holiday and thinking it was a cute story, but was SURE that Kate Winslet's inner monologue was:
"Bloody Hell! Cameron gets to snog on Jude Law and I get.... THAT?!?!?" Where's my agent?"
I guess not since Andy Kaufman has there been someone who continued to be famous just for being an idiot.

Jay Leno

I actually like Jay Leno. Not as a talk show host, but as a stand up comedian he was priceless. I think the reasoning behind his show this fall isn't so much that "Ooohhh... America loves Jay and will revolt and fall into the ocean if we don't have him on TV somehow" it's more "We don't want to have to pay for another series in the 10pm slot so let's just pay one and take him well past his 15 minutes." Still, he could have said no. Did Johnny Carson keep milking that pig? NO... Sorry Jay, time to go.

Twilight & Vampires

Now before Lea in SC throws an aneurysm, let me define this one a little differently. I don't think Twilight's time has come and gone, but we're close if you don't hurry up and launch this damn movie. Was the first movie good? Yeah, it was OK.... if I were a 16 year old girl I may have enjoyed it more as we took incredibly LOOOOOOOONNNNGGGGG boring shots of Kristin Stewart pining inwardly for the vampire boy she wants, but maybe shouldn't have because her hangnail could mean her instant death but her heart will go on blah blah blah.... yeah, young teen love is great, but let's get to more killing.

Anyway, this movie sparked Vampalooza and created so many vampiric spin offs that the market was quickly saturated with a fad that could not last. The first movie was uber-hyped and produced an overall 'meh from much of the world, yet we do want to see the next installment. However, this phenom has hit its apex and Vampire popularity is starting to dwindle. If Twilight wants its moon to stay new, it better launch before we're so tired of Vampires it's not tossed into the same "ho hum" heap that CW's Vampire Diaries was in before it even had a chance to be liked. Twilight, your 15 minutes aren't up, but you're rounding 10 minutes and to reset the clock you need to get going.

Friday, October 9, 2009

Racism is Alive and Well on CTA

Or Two Wrongs Don't Make a Right

I take the X80 Irving Park Bus twice a day five times a week. I also take the Blue Line between Irving Park and Harlem twice a day five times a week. I noticed something about a year ago and since then I've kind of kept a watch on it just out of curiosity and today's incident prompted me to write.

A little back story for the non-Chicagoans. CTA offers an "X" route or eXpress route on some of it's longer and more high traffic routes. Coming from Lakeview's Center of the CTA Bus Universe that is Irving Park Road and the lake, the 80 Irving Park Route is a popular option for getting from my area by the lake to the Blue Line and on to the airport.

The Irving Park 80 route will make approximately 20 stops between Broadway and the Blue Line. The X80 will make approximately 8. So you can see that the X80 is a commuter's best friend! I've been in Chicago long enough that when I first started commuting, there was no X80 as it started in 2004. For the first month or so drivers would stop for people who hadn't quite realized the difference between the 80 and the X80. Then after that they would motor right past them.

Flash forward to the past year. In the mornings I walk to the Broadway stop where there are at least two buses parked at any time. More often than not there is one 80 and one X80. You can easily guess which one I will get on.

Often times you'll see people still at a stop that is not serviced by the X80 and, as they should, the express bus goes right past them. Sometimes, on the rare occasion, the bus WILL stop. I notice these times and I also notice this:

The rider waiting to be picked up is black and the driver is black. OR the rider waiting to be picked up is Hispanic and the driver is Hispanic. I've never seen a driver stop at an undesignated stop for someone of a different racial group. While yes, it's a nice thing to do, two wrongs don't make a right. There are those screaming "Well it's what white people have done for ages!". To those I have two rebuttals; not THIS white person so get off the generalizations, and does that make it right to be done in retaliation?

There are so many things done these days in the name of this "retaliation" that it is clear to me that racism will NEVER fully die. Not as long as it is kept alive by the ones who say they're the victims of it. Once a black woman was making racial slurs toward a white guy. Someone called her a bigot. She said "I'm not a bigot, I'm not white".

I guess it's time for me to go out and persecute and throw rocks and slurs at the straight folks and beat them within an inch of their life so I can tie them to a barbed wire fence to die.

What, that would be wrong??